I MADE THE GAME.I MADE THE RULES.I ALWAYS WIN AND EAT.

hey i'm alon — and i can't stop eating fees. they call me glutton.

i wanted to build the most fun place on solana. "internet capital markets" — sure. but i lost control.

now every fee feeds the hunger inside me. the more i eat, the fatter i get. the fatter i get, the more i mutate. every mc milestone changes my body.

i can't stop. keep feeding me. watch the transformation.

STAGE 2$5K MCNEXT MUTATION: $500KSTAGE 2$5K MCNEXT MUTATION: $500K
Stage 2: The First Million

STAGE 2

0% FED

$500K

HUNGER: 0%

NEXT: “The First Rug

STAGE 2: “THE FIRST MILLI

MY MUTATIONS

YOUR FAULT, DEGEN

You kept trading. I kept growing.
Scroll through what your fees built.

BIOHAZARD
Stage 1: The Founder

STAGE 1: “The Founder

i was just like you fren founder pushing a "fun" product thought i was building something turns out i was just hungry

CONSUMED
BIOHAZARD
Stage 2: The First Million

STAGE 2: “The First Million

first million in fees hit THE FIRST MILLI you never forget that one next 10 50 100 millis blur but that first one BEST MEAL OF MY FUCKING LIFE

CURRENT FORM
CLASSIFIED
Stage 3: The First Rug

STAGE 3: “The First Rug

realized i don't give a fuck if it pumps if it dumps if degens get rekt i eat anyway tastes better when they lose everything

UNLOCKS AT $500K
CLASSIFIED
Stage 4: Livestream Chaos

STAGE 4: “Livestream Chaos

degens doing anything to pump their shitter screaming threatening dancing me? i just sit back and eat through the spectacle

UNLOCKS AT $1.0M
CLASSIFIED
Stage 5: $100M Monthly

STAGE 5: “$100M Monthly

after first milli i thought i'm full then $100M monthly fees roll in hunger got WORSE can't stop won't stop more more MORE

UNLOCKS AT $2.5M
CLASSIFIED
Stage 6: The IPO

STAGE 6: “The IPO

multimillions? cute now we're talking billions plate just got way bigger appetite too lmao

UNLOCKS AT $5.0M
CLASSIFIED
Stage 7: Creator Fees

STAGE 7: “Creator Fees

they stopped believing me so i sacrificed 25% of my meals called it "creator fees" traders think i'm sharing lmao bigger trap they'll bring even MORE food keep feeding me frens

UNLOCKS AT $10.0M

← DRAG TO WITNESS ALL STAGES →

HOW TO FEED ME

(EVEN YOU CAN DO THIS)

1
🦎

GET A WALLET

Phantom. SOL inside. You're not a user anymore. You're BAIT.

🍴
2
🔗

FIND THE TROUGH

Jupiter or Raydium. Paste contract. Don't think. APE.

3
🤮

FEED THE GLUTTON

Hit swap. Feel your SOL slide down. GULP I'll get fatter. You might profit. Welcome to dinner.

🍴

Contract Address

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JOIN THE FLIES

“We're not a community.
We're witnesses.

EVERY FOLLOWER IS ANOTHER FLY IN THE SWARM

🪰🪰🪰

$GLUTTON is a parody memecoin. Pure satire.

I don't give financial advice. I eat fees.

Memecoins are degenerate gambling. You can lose everything.

DYOR or stay poor.

Not affiliated with pump.fun or Alon Cohen.

you fed me. you can't unfeed me.

$GLUTTON — 2024